Montevista | Funeral Wishes Document Template and Guide
Funeral Wishes Document Template and Guide
A funeral wishes document records your preferences for your final arrangements in a clear, accessible format. This guide provides a comprehensive template you can use to document your wishes, along with instructions for completing each section.
Why Document Your Wishes
Even if you haven’t made formal arrangements with a funeral home, a written wishes document provides invaluable guidance for your family. It answers questions, prevents disagreements, and ensures your preferences guide decisions.
Benefits: – Family knows what you want – Reduces family conflict and second-guessing – Provides legal weight to your preferences – Can be created without any cost – Easily updated as preferences change
Complete Funeral Wishes Document Template
Copy this template and fill in your information. You can type it, handwrite it, or adapt it to your needs.
FUNERAL WISHES DOCUMENT
Document Version: 1.0 Date Created: __ Last Updated: __
PERSONAL INFORMATION
Full Legal Name: ______ (Include maiden name if applicable)
Also Known As: ______ (Nicknames, previous names)
Date of Birth: __
Place of Birth: __
Social Security Number: __
Current Address: ______
Mother’s Full Name (including maiden): ______
Father’s Full Name: ______
PRIMARY DECISIONS
Disposition Preference: ☐ Burial ☐ Cremation ☐ Green/Natural Burial ☐ Aquamation (water cremation) ☐ Body Donation ☐ Other: __
Reason for this choice (optional):
Service Type: ☐ Traditional funeral service ☐ Memorial service (after disposition) ☐ Celebration of life ☐ Graveside service only ☐ No service ☐ Other: __
Religious or Secular: ☐ Religious service in __ tradition ☐ Spiritual but not religious ☐ Completely secular ☐ Interfaith/blended ☐ Family decides
SERVICE DETAILS
Preferred Service Location: ☐ Funeral home chapel ☐ Church/place of worship: __ ☐ Cemetery chapel/graveside ☐ Outdoor location: __ ☐ Other: __ ☐ No preference
Preferred Officiant: ☐ Clergy from my faith community Name if known: __ ☐ Professional celebrant/funeral officiant ☐ Family member: __ ☐ Friend: __ ☐ No preference
Service Size: ☐ Large public service (open to all) ☐ Medium gathering ☐ Small/intimate (immediate family only) ☐ Private (family determines attendees) ☐ No preference
Viewing/Visitation: ☐ Open casket viewing ☐ Closed casket, no viewing ☐ Private family viewing only ☐ Visitation hours before service ☐ No viewing ☐ Not applicable (cremation)
CEREMONY PREFERENCES
Music Selections:
☐ No specific preferences—family chooses
Readings, Poems, or Scriptures:
☐ No specific preferences—family chooses
Who Should Speak/Deliver Eulogy:
☐ Open to anyone who wishes ☐ Invitation only (family determines) ☐ No eulogies
Photo Displays or Memory Tables: ☐ Yes, display photos from throughout my life ☐ Create memory table with meaningful items ☐ Video tribute/slideshow ☐ Simple photo display ☐ No photos or displays
Flowers or Charitable Donations: ☐ Flowers are welcome ☐ Donations to charity instead of flowers Preferred charity: __ ☐ Both flowers and donations acceptable ☐ No preference
Reception After Service: ☐ Reception with meal Preferred location: __ ☐ Light refreshments and gathering ☐ Informal gathering at family home ☐ No reception ☐ Leave to family’s discretion
FINAL RESTING PLACE
Cemetery/Location: ☐ Specific cemetery: __ ☐ Plot already purchased: Yes / No Plot location/number: __ ☐ No specific cemetery selected yet ☐ Preference: __ ☐ Not applicable (scattering, etc.)
For Burial: ☐ In-ground burial ☐ Above-ground mausoleum ☐ Specific location preference: __
For Cremation: ☐ Burial of urn in cemetery ☐ Placement in columbarium ☐ Scattering at: __ ☐ Family keeps urn ☐ Family decides ☐ Other: __
Companion Burial (if applicable): ☐ Buried with spouse: __ ☐ Side-by-side plots ☐ Double-depth plot ☐ Not applicable
PRODUCTS AND MERCHANDISE
Casket Preference (if burial): ☐ Wood casket ☐ Metal casket ☐ Eco-friendly/biodegradable casket ☐ Simple, affordable casket ☐ Rental casket (if cremation after viewing) ☐ No specific preference ☐ Budget range: __
Urn Preference (if cremation): ☐ Traditional urn ☐ Biodegradable urn ☐ Keepsake urns for family ☐ Simple, affordable urn ☐ No specific preference ☐ Budget range: __
Burial Vault or Grave Liner: ☐ Basic grave liner (required minimum) ☐ Protective burial vault ☐ No preference ☐ Not applicable
Headstone/Grave Marker: ☐ Upright headstone ☐ Flat grave marker ☐ Memorial bench ☐ Simple marker with name and dates ☐ Family decides ☐ Not applicable
Inscription/Epitaph Preference:
PERSONAL DETAILS
Clothing for Burial/Viewing: ☐ Specific outfit: __ ☐ Favorite clothing ☐ New burial clothes ☐ Traditional burial garments ☐ Not applicable (cremation) ☐ Family decides
Items to Be Buried/Cremated With Me: ☐ Specific items: __ ☐ Photos or letters ☐ Religious items ☐ Nothing ☐ Family decides
Obituary Preferences: ☐ I have written my obituary (location: __) ☐ Key points to include: __
☐ Organizations/affiliations to mention: __ ☐ Photo to use: __ ☐ Where to publish: __ ☐ Family should write obituary
FINANCIAL INFORMATION
Budget Guidance: ☐ Specific budget: $__ ☐ General guidance: __ ☐ As simple and affordable as possible ☐ Standard, mid-range service ☐ No budget limits ☐ Family decides based on estate
Funeral Funding: ☐ Pre-paid funeral arrangements Funeral home: __ Contract location: __ ☐ Life insurance policy Company: __ Policy number: __ ☐ Dedicated savings account Bank/account: __ ☐ Estate funds ☐ Other: __
SPECIAL REQUESTS OR ADDITIONAL WISHES
(Use this space for anything not covered above)
IMPORTANT CONTACTS AND INFORMATION
Person Designated to Handle Arrangements: Name: __ Relationship: __ Phone: __ Email: __
Executor of Estate: Name: __ Phone: __
Attorney: Name: __ Phone: __
Preferred Funeral Home (if selected): Name: __ Phone: __ Contact person: __
Clergy/Spiritual Advisor: Name: __ Phone: __
People to Notify Immediately: 1. Name: __ Phone: __ 2. Name: __ Phone: __ 3. Name: __ Phone: __
LOCATION OF IMPORTANT DOCUMENTS
Birth Certificate: __
Social Security Card: __
Military Discharge Papers (DD-214): __
Marriage Certificate: __
Cemetery Deed: __
Pre-Paid Funeral Contract: __
Life Insurance Policies: __
Will/Trust: __
Other Important Documents: __
SIGNATURES AND WITNESSES
My Signature: ______ Date: __
Witness 1 Signature: ___ Date: __ Printed Name: _____
Witness 2 Signature: ___ Date: __ Printed Name: _____
(Witnesses are optional but recommended for added legal weight)
Copies of This Document Provided To:
- ______ (Name) Date given: __
- ______ (Name) Date given: __
- ______ (Name) Date given: __
Instructions for Completing Your Funeral Wishes Document
Personal Information Section
Fill in completely and accurately. This information is needed for death certificates and legal documents.
Tip: Include former names if you’ve changed your name. This helps with locating records.
Primary Decisions
These are the most important choices. Be clear and specific.
If unsure: It’s okay to check “family decides” for items you’re flexible about.
Service Details
Think about what kind of service fits your personality and values.
Consider: Will family be traveling from far away? Should the service be where most people live?
Ceremony Preferences
Specific music, readings, and speakers make services more personal.
Tip: Include titles and artists for music. For readings, include book/chapter or provide a copy.
Final Resting Place
If you’ve purchased a plot or have preferences, document them clearly.
Important: Include location of cemetery deed if you own a plot.
Products
You don’t have to select specific products. General guidance helps (simple vs. elaborate, budget range).
Special Requests
Use this for anything unique or important to you that doesn’t fit other categories.
Examples: – “Please keep the service under one hour” – “I’d like the reception to be casual, not formal” – “Include my favorite poem even though it’s not traditional”
Important Contacts
This section helps family know who to call immediately.
Critical: Make sure contact information is current.
Document Location
Tell family where to find all important papers. This saves hours of searching.
After Completing Your Document
1. Date and sign it. This shows it’s your current, considered wishes.
2. Have witnesses sign (optional but recommended). Two adults who aren’t beneficiaries of your estate.
3. Make copies. Provide copies to everyone who needs them.
4. Store the original safely. Accessible location, not only in a safe deposit box.
5. Tell family where it is. Document location should be known to multiple people.
6. Review and update periodically. Every 2-3 years or when circumstances change.
Legal Considerations
Is this document legally binding?
Legal status varies by state. In California, documented wishes are generally honored, especially when: – Clearly written and dated – Signed by you – Preferably witnessed – Shared with family in advance
For maximum legal weight: – Have it notarized – Reference it in your will – Make formal arrangements with a funeral home – Consult an attorney if you anticipate family conflict
Updating Your Document
When you update: – Create a new version with updated date – Note “Version 2.0” or “Updated [Date]” – Destroy old versions to prevent confusion – Provide updated copies to everyone who had the original
Key Takeaways
A funeral wishes document protects your preferences:
- Template provided covers all essential decisions
- Complete what matters to you; leave flexible items to family
- Clear documentation prevents family disagreement
- Multiple copies ensure family can find your wishes
- Regular updates keep information current
Taking time to document your wishes thoroughly is one of the most valuable gifts you can give your family.
Get Help with Your Funeral Wishes Document
Monte Vista provides funeral planning worksheets and can help you think through all the decisions in this template. If you’d like guidance completing your funeral wishes document or want to discuss any aspects of pre-planning, we’re here to help.
Call 510-299-1174 to schedule a consultation where we can walk you through documenting your wishes completely and clearly.